So I used to think there was one right answer for all kinds of situations in life. Like there’s an ideal way to do this or that. Sometimes I saw the answer as the way I did things, and often I saw the answer as something that felt so out of reach for me. I would think how much I needed to change or be different so I could meet this ideal.
As I’ve been learning how the Holy Ghost feels, I’m learning how unique the answers are for various situations. Things are often not as they seem. When I think I have something or someone figured out, I discover how much I didn’t know. I keep learning time and again that I need to turn to the Lord. He will “show me all things which I should do” (2 Nephi 32:5).
There are times to speak up, times to listen. Sometimes I crave running and sometimes I go for weeks without-wondering if I’ll ever run again. When I received an answer for my struggles with food, I wanted to know why and how it would all work out. I feared all the consequences of what would happen if I really embraced the answer. And the answer I was given seemed to go against what I had always thought. “But what will people think? But how can I explain this to anyone-wouldn’t they think I’m nuts? But this goes against everything I always thought…” And on and on I worried, but I knew deep down what I needed to do. And I really wanted this answer to lead me to what I wanted for myself-to what I thought would make me happy. But I keep discovering that following the Holy Spirit leads me to something better than what I had thought was best. God’s ways are not my ways and He keeps blessing me for listening-wow does he bless me. But I have to let go of my one right answer. And I don’t know where this will lead, but I’m learning to trust in the Lord-after all, he’s all-knowing. If the answers in life were obvious, then I wouldn’t need faith. I keep smiling as I discover how unique the answers are for me and my worries-it’s just not what I thought! And I smile as I learn how custom-made the answers are for each of us.
I love the example of the Israelites manna from heaven-they received it day to day. They couldn’t store it up but had to rely on the Lord each day to provide for them. I’m learning to live day to day, “not knowing before hand the things I should do” (1 Nephi 4:6). There are times that I am doing something and it feels totally fulfilling-so if it was right before, it will be right again…and again. Yet I find it might be right again another day, and it might not. Sometimes I get an answer from the Lord and want to cling to it-I fear losing the light he gives me and I often try to apply this one answer to many things. But it doesn’t work that way-I’m learning he wants my faith. Life changes so quickly. There’s just not one right answer.
If everything changes-where is the stability? The course of the Lord is one eternal round. All truth is found in Him. Yet everyone’s life, situation, personalities, gifts are all so unique to each individual. I just look at my kids and am amazed at how unique they are. I’ve learned what is right for one child isn’t right for another. What helps one of them shine, might make another feel confused or discouraged. It doesn’t mean one is greater or less than another, they just have different needs, worries, and talents.
I have to rely on the Lord. What he tells me is right for me is not the answer for everyone. And often that is the trial of my faith. When the Spirit tells me of things I should or shouldn’t do, I sometimes hear the opposition say, “but what would people think…you know what so and so will say…” And if I listen to the devil who wants everyone miserable like himself-I might feel resentful or bothered. And any of that doubt, misery, annoyed feelings come from the opposition and keeps me from fulfilling the measure of my creation. This also reminds me to withhold judgment when I see people doing things that I don’t understand. I’m reminded of how unique we all are and what’s right for them might not be right for me and vice versa. What we do is between ourselves and the Lord. The beauty of it is how unique each path is that leads to our Savior.
So there isn’t one right answer, or maybe there is…turn to the Lord:)